GUS

 This is my Monday post on Thursday! Our new puppy swallows an indigestible item. Surgery and recovery in addition to work and the political situation have consumed my time and energy. We got Angus to help us heal. Our dog Oatie, 15 years old, died less than a month after Andrew died. I"ve missed Oatie even though the last six months of his life, I worried constantly about his quality of life. Some days seemed okay, some days not. I think of him as his younger self, playing, pain free with Andrew in heaven. 

So Gus. a mixed breed, 40 pounds (please don't get bigger!) huge cuddle dog, 9 months old, active puppy. A reminder about love; it's a action not just a feeling. A reminder about the work of loss and grief taking energy; I'm more overwhelmed and tearful in situations I wouldn't be before. Gus nips at us. Gus isn't bonded to us but this recent crisis has moved his affection along. Gus is alot of work. Gus is happy to see us. Happy to go for a walk. Happy at his life. Grateful, I think to be warm, fed and sometimes even feel safe.A reminder from my old self; don't let worry and the ongoing unfolding of life get in the way of your life, your living. I worked hard to not let Andrew's addiction get in the way of my living. He sleeps alot right now. But I'm worrying rather than going for a walk. Changing that today on our beautiful snowing morning. See you next week.